21 ANSWERS - DAY 20

Eileen L of NY, USA says

Hi Gemma, My mom is a medium too and has leaked that I will be following in a similiar footstep. Knowing this makes me anxious and worried if I'm making the right decisions about my life especially in my career and relationships. I also find it difficult to talk to my mom because I never know when she says things to me, if it's her own thoughts and ideas or she's speaking from somewhere else. Any insight would be deeply appreciated.

Hi Eileen, thank you for writing.  As you may know I have an almost 18 year old son, JD (who also happens to have "the gift," so your question definitely really hit home for me.  Let me start by saying that my answer to you will be as a mom, not as a medium, in other words I am not going to tap in at all to answer it - probably a bigger challenge than the entire 21 days of questions.  I have found that with my JD, it is very important, to differentiate when I'm mom and when I'm medium as well, but I want to first explain why sometimes us mom's just can't resist putting our two (or sixth) sense in.  See, ALL we want is for you guys (our kids) is to have everything, to be happy, to never get hurt, to make choices that benefit you and to be safe etc.  Sometimes because we want that so bad, we may forget that it's YOUR journey and that not only do you need to learn your stuff on your own, but you may not want our insight. Something I've definitely seen with people that have this gift is that it is very hard sometimes to bud out of the lives of those who are close to us.  Especially family and partners.  I have made it a conscious decision not to do either, but some don't even know they are doing it.  So if you should choose to "follow in her footsteps" (which we'll get to in a sec) listen carefully, take this lesson with you.  Even though we want to help, it is critical that we let our loved ones take their own journey and it is good practice to only help those who seek it out from us.  What JD did in his earlier years if I did slip and read him without him requesting it is very clearly let me know that he's talking to me as mom, not as medium and that I needed to only answer as mom.  By setting that clear expectation and boundary for me, I have learned not to impulsively use my gift when interacting with him or anyone else I'm close to for that matter.)  Once in a blue he may come to me for a reading but on a daily we leave my gift to my clients. I say all this for you to know that while mom totally means well, she may not even realize that she does this or that it bothers you.  Tell her Eileen.  Tell her that you need her as mom right now, not as medium.  And don't worry, she seems pretty thick skinned so you won't crush her if you tell her.  She'll get it.

As for whether or not you will "follow in her footsteps," this is ENTIRELY up to you.  Having the gift and deciding it is you life's purpose are two different things.  Stop pressuring yourself right now.  Trust me, if it is the reason you are here, you will know.  Until then, pursue your interests, listen to your gut and make your decisions based on what you feel good about not what you think or have been told you "should" do.  In other words you are putting way too much pressure on yourself to know if you want to dedicate your life to this or anything else yet.  You don't have to do that.   Wow, I gotta say right now I so understand your mom because I have such the urge to tap into your future and tell you what I see for you.  I am actively deciding not to because I don't think I'd be helping you by giving you those answers, but imagine, I don't know you and I had to fight that urge, add her love for you to that and it makes total sense that she has a hard time separating.

Anyway... what I'm saying is that it's entirely up to you, in both career and love as to what you will do...my advice, just let yourself explore, it's ok.  Let yourself find you.  You don't have to choose right now.  You can pursue something else careerwise and still have your gift. Same goes for a partner, just look for love and to be treated the way you deserve to, with honor and respect.  To laugh and enjoy life, to have great communication, and to create fab memories.  Trust that you will be lead to both your life partner and to live your purpose, whatever that may be, and by the time you get to both of them, you will  know it and you won't be overwhelmed with anxiousness or worry.

Finally, have a quick conversation with Mom.  Tell her what you told me.  She will hear you and adjust accordingly like I said she's not fully aware she's doing it or that it's bothering you so in letting her know this , you will free yourself but also be giving her the opportunity to learn to separate the two.  You can both learn alot from this moment and each other.  Great luck Eileen.

Holla at me peeps!!!  VIEW/POST A COMMENT